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I cant help but emphatise with the 'sky people' even when they are the bad guys, cos I belong to the same race afterall. I didnt know who to side with when they were at war. I just wanted them to stop fighting and stop hurting each other.

Me (enthusiastically): Maybe they should show this to the terrorists and then maybe they will stop fighting?
Yuwei (flatly): Yups. (Obviously replying me for the sake of replying cos his head din even turn and there wasnt even a slight pause to digest wat I said.)

Okay, I'm being childish. It doesnt work this way. But anyway, less the goggles slipping off my nose every other second, great show.

It's finally better now. A big sigh of relieve..
And i'm glad that there are such things as friends. It certainly proved useful this time.

I think I just screwed up my life.
emo MAX.

Double sadness

Agents are agents afterall. Period.

You will never know how painful it is until you've been through it.

5 months

Today, we found out that mum gave up hope even before she was admitted to the hospital. She made a note in her bedside notebook reminding herself to sort out her photos for funeral.

She was unwell for about a month at home and was getting forgetful. It was also getting harder for her to keep her balance, but she didnt mention how bad it felt. I was very angry, that she didnt think her family could share the burden. But then again, if it was me, I would do the same..

Ribena!

After 10 minutes of my whining on Ribena cravings, resourceful daddy made the drink using the flower (or fruit) of the wierd-looking plant that he waters conscientiously everyday. And it really tastes like Ribena! Now that it's been 2 hours, and we're still very much alive, i declare that it's safe to drink!

New msn no difference from old one wat...

I can only clench my fist...

家家有本难念的经

I think...

... it's a blessing to be able to confide in others. It's so much easier to just ramble on and on, then to embrace the advices given; or to remain stubborn and continue grumbling. It takes the burden off! But, being a traditional asian chinese, I am embarassed to share my problems. To me, I'm inflicting my pain upon you and you'll have to go through the trouble of pacifying me. Sometimes I feel that if you probe further, I might tell. But I guess I drew my line too deep inside that you tend to give up before crossing it. Even when I very much love to listen when others share their troubles, I still find it difficult to speak up. I truly understand how it feels for people who keep to themselves. We're not being selfish nor trying to "mislead others into thinking that everything is peachy and rosy". It's just easier to say "I'm fine". For me, it helps by appearing to be outgoing and taking charge of conversations because that wouldnt give others a chance to ask about me. So deep down inside, I'm a true blue introvert haha.. (though Hang will definitely disagree with my definition of an introvert)

... it's a blessing to be a confidant too. I'm not good at it. I'm so impatient that I either second-guess their thoughts or finish up their sentences for them (which I suppose can be quite irritating). And being insensitive doesnt help at all as I'm normally clueless after listening to the stories, picking up none of the issues hinted at. Okay I admit that sometimes I feel that their problems are not even problems to begin with (like being fat or having squabbles or hating jobs) because when compared to matters of life and death (even more so when i've just been through one recently), these are what I would label as immaterial (suggest to leave). By penning these thoughts, I risk losing the only few friends that are willing to confide in me. But not to worry, even fewer would be paying this blog a visit (probably only ms lim and ms chan, and sometimes ms seah, and maybe ms siew). To the few friends, I enjoy being and would love to continue being your confidant. It shows that my views matter and you feel your secret is safe with me. I will try to offer my very best advice; if not, just a listening ear!

Note that this entry was inspired by ms seah's post (which she copied from a newspaper article and successfully tricked me into thinking that she was indeed that cheem to write such a beautiful essay).

you have no idea

When I say there are MANY roaches, you dont wanna imagine how MANY my many is... trust me, you dont wanna know

One step closer

Yes! Third class today! Slightly hectic with the sudden rush of children into the studio at 2pm and the pile of cash and cheques thrown behind the counter (okay, exaggerating abit here).

When will the day come that Legato be able to hire me? and pay out profits? and have our own space?

Meanwhile, my desktop is filled with Yuwei's resumes and cover letters.

I love the afternoon breeze at home. There's a "home-cooked food" fragrance in the air. Not from my kitchen, of cos haha.

On toil and at work at the same time.

Updates

First MYC Thomson class last evening! We have alot more to learn and improve on, so ganbatte!!

After a good long 5 months, Yuwei's back! I'm glad he didnt abandon me for a 中国妹 muhahhahah (okay i know i know i'm like 90% a 中国妹 and it would be the same for him and bla bla bla).

L&E for work next week, should be rather free. Please jio for lunch!

Lastly, try not to ask me if i'm okay or not. I know you're just concerned but because no matter what, my reply will be "i'm fine, thank you"; it kindof serves no purpose. Thank you for the concern, really. It takes time, and i'll be fine soon. oh and i'm fine if you wanna talk bout it so dun be afraid to ask if you want to know more.

Bejeweled is addictive.

古人真厉害

It reallie takes 49 days. then I guess it's gonna take 3 years more

A picture speaks a thousand words (part II)

According to old chinese sayings, cremated bones will have shades of pink, green or blue when a person's done many good deeds in her life. Then again, I read that if bones was exposed to copper during cremation, the bones turn pink too. It's probably due to the bags we placed in hahah.

Either way, she was undeniably a good person, be it wife, sister, 阿姨/姑姑/舅妈/婶婶, teacher, or friend. And to us, the best mother ever.

I will get use to speaking to pictures. I will get use to burning things.

Please pray for her...

It's not well

It's still the same... and I thought the situation got better...
I know she's referring to me, but i refuse to surrender my dignity... or rather, i was saving my "face".
It sucks. This is so not cool..
I suck. Time to change for the better.

A picture speaks a thousand words

Lousy doctor

I had a bad flu since last week and so I finally decided to see a doctor last night. I left work early at 830pm (yes this is considered early) and reached the clinic near my place at 910pm. The receptionist insist that she cannot take in any more patients as the doctor was suppose to leave at 9 SHARP and they do not pay the doctor for overtime. You would imagine that she was explaining to me kindly, but NO, she was shouting at me over the counter while packing her stuff. Totally opposite of how you would treat a customer, especially when it's a sick person. I believe I appeared sick enough, with my sneezing and sniffing, to show that I needed immediate consultation and medication. And I only needed the medicine for a common flu (ermm, and mc of cos) so it's gonna be fast. Plus I just got off from work, how to reach anytime earlier?
And so after 3 minutes of my 死缠烂打, she finally grabbed my parkway health card and punched in the codes, mumbling (out loud) how she should not accept anymore patients. She found my records and chucked it through the window to the doctor. And I thought yes, I did it! But NOOooo, the evil doctor pushed my card back out and said he DO NOT WANT TO SEE ANYMORE PATIENTS! WTH! And this got the receptionist rambling (a.k.a. shouting) on and on again on how they close at 9 and I should have went earlier and they do not pay these doctors OT so they shouldnt make him stay and bla bla bla.. Lousy part-time doctor! Must be one of those who just graduated, running extra shifts at clinics to increase their miserable pay at the hospitals. What if I was dying? What if my flu worsen at night, developing to pneumonia? And you, lousy doctor, rather I sneeze and cough throughout the night than to leave 5 minutes later because you were not getting any OT? I was really pissed and was SO ready to complain once I get an email address.
After visiting the clinic again this morning, I couldnt find any email address or namecards in the clinic =\ I wasnt sure if the doctor was the one last night, so I didnt dare to open my mouth as that would risk my mc (other than when he had to check my throat). And I couldnt find any Greenlife Clinic & Surgery group email online either. So here I am, writing it down on my miserable blog which nobody would read. I truly believe in WOM (word-of-mouth) so if you do read this, please help to spread the message: IF YOU ARE A DOCTOR, PLEASE HAVE SOME 医德.

Marley & Me, License to Wed, and Bride Wars.. Been watching too many wedding and family shows recently. Makes me feel like getting married, starting a family, have kids, and a dog too (inspiration from Marley & Me)! I wanna be a young, cool and hips mum. And I dun wanna be working; I love to slack. Then I can go for my yoga lessons, walk the dog, yum cha, play mj, do some reading (always a "hobby" on my resume that is never really performed consistently), pick up the kids at school, go shopping, do facial, and play Wii..

I know I know, I'll dream on..

Counting down 69 days to my holiday! =)

Today i left work early. Not only were there sunlight, there was rainbow! Two, in fact! A very faint one parallel to this one which my 3.2-megapixel Carl Zeiss failed to capture . The cab uncle offered to stop by the side for us to take pictures. We said no need and later on he was secretly juggling between the steering wheel and his handphone. So funny!

Yay, rainbow! Tomorrow must be a good day (since there's not much of today left).

I am looking forward to June. =)

In a crisis born of greed and recklessness, pity is in short supply.

Booo~

My thousand AU is leaving for Shanghai in 2 days' time and wont be back for half a year.. Dear friends, do include me for all kinds of outing, i'm going to be so free.. (Err that's if I have no work on hand)

Ahhh~~ I wanna be tai tai..

My Retirement Celebration

If you happen to be at Robinson Road junction on the Capitol Tower end, look for the green roadsign that says "Robinson Road". Unlike the other roadsigns around Singapore, it's rounded on one side, but straight on the other! (The other roadsigns are all rectangles with rounded sides.) Hmmm, wonder what happened to the straight end. How observant of me to notice so. =) (edit: I realise it jus means Robinson Road ends here =\)

Bangkok was fun. Didnt get to shop much, but had fun hanging around with friends (or colleagues). No pictures, cos i'm lazy (sorry Ms Siew hahah).

This current job is killing me. Typical client-not-ready-yet-tight-reporting-deadline situation. No motivation from team as well cos they're all quitting soon. I reallie hate this job, and i know i did a bad job, i'm so not raising an appraisal hahha.. The only plus point is that the seniors are chio and nice =) Wonder how the normally buzzling financial district will look like on weekends. See you if you're working on Saturday too!